I feel guilty. Ashamed. And a little bit dirty… I’ve let myself down, and I’ve let you down. That’s right – the other night I tucked into a plate of beans on toast WITHOUT adding Salad Cream!!

I can hear you all screaming: “Why?? But why would you do this?! I thought we were in this together!!”. Yes, yes – I hear you, and you all have very valid points; but I want to take this opportunity to explain myself, and maybe we’ll learn something about ourselves along the way… You ready? C’mon then, lets go.

It was Wednesday night – I’ve just gotten back from work, hungry and knackered enough that I can’t be arsed to cook something “proper” for dinner. The answer = beans on toast. Classic! However, once the aforementioned beans were ready and placed on the aforementioned toast it wasn’t the Salad Cream I reached for to decorate my plate in a Jackson Pollock kind of way, but…. gulp… HP BBQ Sauce: Smokey Barbeque variety.

So where the heck was Salad Cream?! Wellll… turns out that although I love baked beans, and I love Salad Cream, and it was only the other day I was raving about the joys of eating a beans AND Salad Cream combo (one of the great pleasures in the world! We will discuss the beauty of eating beans straight out of the can avec a good squirt of SC later…), when it comes to beans on toast I’m just no about it.

Jacket potato with beans and Salad Cream – yes.
Sausage, beans and Salad Cream – yummo!
Beans and pretty much anything else with Salad Cream – sign me up!
Beans on toast with Salad Cream – no thanks.

Beans on toast with Salad Cream - this person is clearly a better human than me!

What the hell does this mean?! Am I some kind of sicko!

But I guess this does raise the important question – when is the right time for beans and SC?
Is it sometimes ok to say “no”?
Is this beans/SC business an exact science?
Is this just me!?

I, for one, will be delving into this burning issue and exploring my eating habits over the coming weeks to discover if there is ever another time when beans and Salad Cream are not the prefered option. If you have any thoughts on this I’d appreciate your opinions – I know you must be dying to tell me…

And if we can solve this maybe next week we can tackle world peace?

Lunch time rolls around, again, for the fourth time this week. I must admit I’m catching on to the Salad Cream madness, however, I do not consider myself as hardcore as the other Salad Cream extremists that grace this blog. Today I thought I would try something different, most-so to win the respect of my fellow Salad Creamers.

Today I decided to add Salad Cream to my baguette… this is something that I rarely do with my baguette at lunchtime. I see my baguette as somewhat sacred to my stomach, but I decided to take the plunge. Along with my baguette cut in half, I added a little cheese, chunky tikka-style chicken, Italian-style salad (containing four different types of leaf), a few Chorizo slices and then the almighty Salad Cream, with my usual Branston Chilli & Jalapeno relish. This initially shocked my fellow Salad Creamers, however they soon warmed to the idea of it.

Heinz Salad Cream and Branston Hot Chilli & Jalapeno Relish

Heinz Salad Cream and Branston Hot Chilli & Jalapeno Relish - ready to rock

I must admit, at this point, part of me was doubting what I was about to do… but if you stick to what you’ve got, you’ll never learn anything new right? I did the deed. I’m aware that I’ve put more relish on the baguette than the salad cream, however this was almost the insurance… just incase things went wrong. Below are some close-ups for you to enjoy.

A beautiful close-up of the Salad Cream and Branston relish living in harmony together

A beautiful close-up of the Salad Cream and Branston relish living in harmony together

Another stunning close-up of the Salad Cream and Branston relish

Another stunning close-up of the Salad Cream and Branston relish

Another close-up of the Salad Cream and Branston relish from another angle

Another close-up of the Salad Cream and Branston relish from another angle

Verdict: Yes. This is a must try, if you like chilli and salad cream, give this a go!

Matt just found this and sent it to me – this is the bloody best cake I have EVER seen!!

I can’t work out if they really meant to write ’59’ instead of the usual ’57’ that adorns the front of all Heniz products? Or was it for a 59th birthday?

Who cares, it’s freaking great. And it’s also a cunning combination of Salad Cream and dessert – which normally can never be uttered in the same sentence!




I found one!!! Somebody else who is equally obsessed with Salad Cream as me!!

Enter the dude who sits opposite me at work – Matt. We have had several Salad-Cream-based conversations over the last week and straight away I knew he was one of the SC gang.

But today he has astounded me with an all new, never before seen Salad Cream lunch idea which is an outstanding piece of creativity!

1. Take one mini pork pie
2. Cut the top/lid off
3. Remove the gross meat bit from the middle (sorry – I’m not a pork pie fan)
4. Pour in a couple of centimetres of Salad Cream
5. Cut the top of the pie and the meat bits up into bite-sized pieces
6. Dip the pieces into the Salad Cream and get it down ya!

Ingenious Matt! Hats off to you.

Lunch – Day One

Ok – I cooked some stir-fried vegetables and rice last night for lunch today. It was ok but it felt like something was missing… can you guess what?

Mmmm… !

I’m not a weirdo. Or at least I didn’t think I was until this week when the guys I work with discovered I have a deep and unending love for that wonderful summer condiment: Salad Cream.

I can’t remeber how my “special relationship” with the yellowy stuff was revealed at work – it probably has something to do with the fact that I have a miniature bottle of Heinz Salad Cream Light in my desk drawer at all times, for emergencies of course. And somehow this started a conversation about how far my obsession with Salad Cream goes….. far compared to most people apparently!

So, because I happen to work with blokes who are totally into websites, the internet, and all things geeky (in the nicest possible way of course guys!) they created this site for me so I could share my Salad Cream love with the world! Yeah, it’s not quite as revolutionary as Facebook, but it’s something to do isn’t it?

I’ll be blogging (is that the right term?) about all things Salad Cream: favourite meal ideas, not so favourite meal ideas, good stuff, bad stuff, and other totally useless information.

I’m sure I’m not the only one out there who conceals this dark secret, so I encourage all of my fellow Salad Cream fans to step forward and be counted! …. Then we can look like a bunch of twats together!